In the In Between

I've been really hesitant to post about what's going on with us  because right now so much is up in the air, and the things that are not require so much attention and emotional energy that...well, it doesn't make for interesting (or uplifting) reading. The result is that my attention is scattered all over the place, and that, too, is an impediment to writing anything worth reading.

I resolved early on not to make this blog a place to wallow, which has forced me to give much more thought to the tumult in our lives before I commit it to writing.  That's probably been good for the soul, as most introspection is. But, again, not blog-worthy until it actually goes somewhere.   Lately, it really seems like the "somewhere" Jake and I both keep coming back to is our faith. That's been a good thing for us as a couple. It is a firm foundation, and a place to find encouragement.  It is helping us to look beyond the immediate struggles to try and see God's plan for us (we know it's there, we're just impatient to find it!).

This morning, as I was discussing with Jake what lay ahead for today (it's going to be a rough day for Jake), I remembered the following passage, which sparked this post:

"But you, oh Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, 
and the lifter of my head" --Psalm 3:3

Next week, Jake will travel to Kansas to sign a lease on a new place to live. We will spend the following week packing, loading the truck, and moving.  Yes, over Thanksgiving.  Our plan was to let the move spill into the following week, but I now have to be at a mediation that entire week, so our plans were changed for us.  The good news, though, is that the mediation is being held in the Bay Area, so it means Howie will get a chance to see his "brother from another mother" RoRo!

RoRo is my best friend's son, so naturally we hoped that the boys would get along.  We even discussed plans to "brainwash" the boys to be friends, long before Howie was even born.

But it turns out that none of that scheming was necessary.  These two boys love each other in a way I still find astonishing.  Who knew infants could identify soul mates? They see each other maybe four times a year in a good year, but they totally love each other. When they are together, it's like no time has passed at all. They talk about each other in the in between times, they enjoy Skype play dates (that is something we really should do more of, but coordinating Central/Pacific Time is not always the easiest thing to do) and they even seem to think alike.  Sometimes, I think they actually have the twin mind-meld thing going on, even though they aren't related (by blood, anyway).  And it has always been that way, since they first met when Howie was three months old and RoRo was almost eleven months old. Witness the marvel that is pure, unadulterated friendship:

The detour to California is not the best thing for our family in terms of getting Jake settled in Kansas.  It means that a lot of the work involved in getting his new place set up (and the house in Louisiana squared away and rented) will spill into December, which means another holiday we'll spend getting through these Army shenanigans.  But I have to tell you, it may well be a blessing in disguise.  

Our life right now is really stressful, and it takes its toll on all of us.  Jake and I have each other (although support from others who love us is also invaluable, and much appreciated), but we aren't the only ones stressed by what we are dealing with.  Our sweet little boy is one smart cookie. He may not know exactly what is happening, but he can sense the tension, and that things are changing.  We are helping him through it as best we can, but all the change is upsetting him, too. And quite frankly, he needs a break. He needs a little RoRo Time! 

Don't get me wrong, I am sad this means we will have to be away from Jake, although hopefully in the following week we can make up some of the time.  And, on the other hand, I also haven't missed the fact that the trip will be a nice diversion for me too. I'll get to spend a little time with some of my favorite loved ones, although the bulk of my time will be spent mediating.  Even that is kind of exciting, though, because it may result in a favorable outcome in a case I've been working on for many years. But I'm especially glad for Howie because I know he needs some time to be with his brother, be loved on, and be a kid.  In some ways, it really feels like God stuck this trip in the middle of our plans to give us a little breathing room. A little in between time to regroup, refresh, and strengthen us for the days ahead. It actually reminds me of a passage from Jeremiah: 

"For I will satisfy the weary soul, and every languishing soul I will replenish." --Jeremiah 31:25

Thank you, Lord, for giving us exactly what we need when we need it.